Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Church and the Sexes
I was very pleased to see my good friend Sheep's Crib get a link from SmartChistian concerning this post on why men don't like going to church. The discussion centers on a book by the guy named David Murrow. Quoting from the book
I also think the church needs to re-examine the role of women in leadership. (Don't stone me yet, let me finish!) Women exercise leadership in an entirely different fashion than men. For example,it is commonly said that women need to talk about problems, and men need to solve them. I think that is very generalized, but reasonably accurate. I'll confess to being frustrated in many a meeting that went on at least 20 minutes longer than I thought was needed.
Women have brought much of value to church leadership (hey, it's how I met my wife!), but sometimes at the cost of making men back off more than they should. I think we need to put some real conscious thought into how to bring the best of both forward, rather than have them exist in some tug-of-war state.
The ideal values of a Christian are often identified as nurturing, verbal expression, tenderness, gentleness. If that's the definition of a Christian, it's going to be a lot harder for a man to achieve that than for a woman to, in most cases.I think Murrow may have overstated his case here, but there is a valid point in the discussion. The church does emphasize the traits he mentions, and they are indeed feminine, but they are also of God. The problem is not those traits, but I do think churches de-emphasizes the masculine part of God's nature that would balance those traits.
We have to give men opportunities to use their strengths and their gifts in the service of God instead of trying to squeeze them into roles that they feel are feminine or emasculating, .... We need to start valuing masculine traits such as aggression, boldness, and competitiveness and figuring out ways that we can integrate that into every area of church life.
I also think the church needs to re-examine the role of women in leadership. (Don't stone me yet, let me finish!) Women exercise leadership in an entirely different fashion than men. For example,it is commonly said that women need to talk about problems, and men need to solve them. I think that is very generalized, but reasonably accurate. I'll confess to being frustrated in many a meeting that went on at least 20 minutes longer than I thought was needed.
Women have brought much of value to church leadership (hey, it's how I met my wife!), but sometimes at the cost of making men back off more than they should. I think we need to put some real conscious thought into how to bring the best of both forward, rather than have them exist in some tug-of-war state.
