Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Genuine Marital Strife
This WaPO Op-ed is frightening The author starts by examining the extremely steep decline in marriage among blacks, but ends this way:
The other comment I have is where is the black church? What is wrong with its teaching that it produces such a decline in marriage and such a cold sounding woman?
I have received far more benefit from marriage than I could have imaged prior. And that benefit is not entirely because of my religious values. The economic benefits have been incredible, but that is not the real point I am trying to make - I am better for having to consider the other - it has improved my professional life tremendously, making me much better able to see from the others perspective - and that is just one example.
How do we get people to look beyond their immediate selves for just a second or two?
Related Tags: marriage, race, narcissism, benefits
But human nature being what it is, if marriage is to flourish -- in black or white America -- it will have to offer an individual woman something more than a business alliance, a panacea for what ails the community, or an incubator for rearing children. As one woman said, "If it weren't for the intangibles, the allure of the lovey-dovey stuff, I wouldn't have gotten married. The benefits of marriage are his character and his caring. If not for that, why bother?"Two things strike me here. The first is how cold the conclusion is - even the allusion to "lovey-dovey" stuff - it is an entirely self-centered appeal.
The other comment I have is where is the black church? What is wrong with its teaching that it produces such a decline in marriage and such a cold sounding woman?
I have received far more benefit from marriage than I could have imaged prior. And that benefit is not entirely because of my religious values. The economic benefits have been incredible, but that is not the real point I am trying to make - I am better for having to consider the other - it has improved my professional life tremendously, making me much better able to see from the others perspective - and that is just one example.
How do we get people to look beyond their immediate selves for just a second or two?
Related Tags: marriage, race, narcissism, benefits