Monday, February 22, 2010
What is it that a young man needs to know about being a man, a husband, and/or a father?I understand where the questions comes from, but I also think asking it is part of the problem.
We are fallen, but that does not turn us into women. We know instinctively how to be men - not godly men mind you, but men. But that means we need to be tamed, not changed. Have boundaries defined, but made into something else. Men are confused about being men becasue women have been trying too hard for too long to fit them into a woman's world. We don't fit.
Our world's meet, they have interchanges, they connect, and when it is really good, they bond, but they will never be the same world. Men don't know how to be men because they were not allowed to be boys. Mothers, things your sons do that scare the you-know-what out of you, are just a challenge to them. And when you forbid him from taking on the challenge, you take a way a bit of his manliness. Wives, few men genuinely like frilly stuff. They will say they do to please you, becasue that's VERY important to them - pleasing you. But when you ask them to be "genuinely sincere" about it, you are taking a way a bit of their manliness.
See here's the thing - men don't need to be taught how to be men, or fill men's roles. They need to have the sharp edges knocked off a little, they need to be constrained from following the worst of their instincts, they need to be shaped into the role - but the role is natural - if we let it be.