Saturday, April 26, 2014
TRULY STUNNED EDITION
You would think that after all these years and all these comic books, that I would be past the point where something would drop my jaw in it's awesome awfulness. But when I ran across Armless Tiger Man, well, let's just say it took me a while to recover my senses. The Wikipedia bio makes a little sense:
Gustav Hertz is a man who worked in a mechanical laboratory in his youth. One day, his arms were caught in the machine and ended up amputated. After being discharged from the hospital, Gustav learned how to use his teeth and feet to act like his hands. After years of training, Gustav became the Armless Tiger Man and started a campaign to destroy machines as his revenge for the loss of his arms. He was finally caught by the Gestapo. When the Gestapo learned about his hatred towards machines, they sent Armless Tiger Man to North America to do as he would.But come on - I mean really - don;t you think some one should have gotten to him with that whole name thing? Why didn't he just call himself, "Dude who can do stuff with his feet," or "I have a lousy dentist guy."
Armless Tiger Man can use his teeth and feet in many ways. He can slide down a chain with his teeth and swing on a rope by biting it. His teeth have been sharpened for use as weapons. With his feet, he can hurl knives from between his toes, catch heavy weights, and perform nimble tasks of agility.
Can you imagine the snickers at the villains bar? "Hey check out all teeth and no brains over there." Not to mention the toe jam in his beer. I don't know how Red Skull keeps a straight look on his face when he uses the guy for a minion. "And you, Arm...hehe...Armless...smirk, smirk...Armless Tiger...guffaw,guffaw (ROTFL). When he finally gets a hold of himself, he'd say something like "Sorry, my bad, but from now on we'll just call you Tigger."
What I really want to know is if the guy that came up with this ever worked in comics again?
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