Monday, December 15, 2014
Is Lonliness A Spiritual Matter?
Tony Reinke @ DG quotes Paul Matthies on lonliness. Just one example:
Sometimes we need to just get practical when we are talking to people. I know from my lonely years that spiritualizing loneliness can serve to increase it as it results in a lot of naval gazing. A lot of focusing on the sinfulness instead of working to overcome it. Yes, start with confession, start with a good hard look at yourself, but then get busy fixing the problems noted. Confessing them again won't help nearly so much as not doing them again.
People tend to divide their spiritual and practical lives never realizing how deeply entwined the two really are. Sometimes improving things on a spiritual leave improves the practical, but sometimes it is the other way around.
You see, the problem is not really, in the end loneliness, its intimacy. Most of us are surrounded by people, but we have few intimates. And we equate intimacy with sex, when in fact they are two very different things. (Could explain a lot in our modern society, couldn't it.) Intimacy is risky. TAke the risk.
intimacy loneliness spirituality
“Loneliness, at its root, is a spiritual issue. We don’t need to merely hang out with more friends. We don’t need to merely learn how to speak love languages. We need help. We need a savior. We need an advocate whose name is Christ Jesus. And our heart cry should not merely be, ‘I do bad things because I’m lonely, so someone come keep me company, make me feel better.’ Our deep heart cry should be, ‘I’m lonely because I’m a sinner in a dark and fallen world. God help me.’”I agree with this quite a bit in content, but very little in tone. The bad things/lonely cycle is real. But the problem has a lot to do with the fact that doing bad things tends to drive away the people that could be friends.
Sometimes we need to just get practical when we are talking to people. I know from my lonely years that spiritualizing loneliness can serve to increase it as it results in a lot of naval gazing. A lot of focusing on the sinfulness instead of working to overcome it. Yes, start with confession, start with a good hard look at yourself, but then get busy fixing the problems noted. Confessing them again won't help nearly so much as not doing them again.
People tend to divide their spiritual and practical lives never realizing how deeply entwined the two really are. Sometimes improving things on a spiritual leave improves the practical, but sometimes it is the other way around.
You see, the problem is not really, in the end loneliness, its intimacy. Most of us are surrounded by people, but we have few intimates. And we equate intimacy with sex, when in fact they are two very different things. (Could explain a lot in our modern society, couldn't it.) Intimacy is risky. TAke the risk.
intimacy loneliness spirituality